Roads like Rollercoasters, Complain Motorists
A group of local motorists have assembled outside of City Hall to protest against the shoddy state of roads in Erisianna.
1. "These roads are terrible!" shouts Charles O'Bannon, president of the Erisianna Auto Club. "Every few feet there's a crack, or a pothole, or a gravel patch, or the remains of someone else's car! It's really too much! And just look at this-" he adds, rubbing a nasty bruise on his forehead - "I got that from my rear-view mirror after flying over a bump on Main Street! These roads must be fixed! There really needs to be vast improvements made now, before anyone gets seriously hurt."
2. Freddy Longbottom, avowed anti-spending advocate, disagrees: "Road construction? What a waste of golden apples! If people can still drive on them, then the roads are fine as they are. Spending more to make trivial repairs would just be a waste of the tax payers' money! We should just ignore these whiners and leave the roads as they are and if the drivers don't like that - well... then they can just learn to walk like the rest of us."
3. "Why on Earth is it the government's responsibility to build and maintain roads?" asks bicyclist Steffan Johnson, pausing for breath. "Not all citizens own automobiles, you know. The government should be trying to make life better for all, not just car owners! If people want roads, then let private industry build them, and they can charge tolls to the people who actually drive on them. Leave the government out of it!"