Appointment of Spiritual Advisor
It's time for the government to hire a new religious advisor. Your people have narrowed down the candidates to:
1. Catholic Archbishop Prudence Wong: boasts an excellent track record, having rapidly increased church attendances in his constituencies through the "Reaching God Through Guilt" program. Seen as a solid choice.
2. New Age thinker Abraham Summers: a left-field candidate with some radical ideas. "For me, it's not about the name of your religion. It's about discovering your spirituality in whatever guise that takes. Some people call that a cult: I call it taking spirituality to the people."
3. Finally, there's George W. Longfellow. "If I am awarded the appointment, I will immediately resign," the ex-schoolteacher has declared. "Because, frankly, God is a big load of hokey. I'll be doing everyone a favor by just shutting up about it."